


southern hospitality

by johnrens



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, College, Crack AU, Fluff, Humor, Kinda fluff, M/M, doyoung invites jaehyun over for dinner, doyoung is a southern white woman in disguise, doyoung's house looks like a cracker barrel, get out spoilers, i projected a lot being asian and from the south, jaehyun is from chicago, jaehyun is masc lmfao, jungwoo is the light of my life, korean student association, live laugh love bitches, lots of it i think, no knowledge of southern things, southern things
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-01
Updated: 2020-04-01
Packaged: 2021-02-26 16:31:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,834
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23436337
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/johnrens/pseuds/johnrens
Summary: Jaehyun didn’t know a lot of things. But Jungwoo has taught him one thing. If you’re Southern and you use the phrase “bless your soul” it’s just a nicer way of saying fuck you.
Relationships: Jung Yoonoh | Jaehyun/Kim Dongyoung | Doyoung
Comments: 5
Kudos: 76





	southern hospitality

**Author's Note:**

> this is all a big crack fic and i had so much fine writing it, i hope you have a lot of fun reading it! more notes after for the inspiration of this fic!

Jaehyun didn’t know a lot of things. Just like most people. But one thing he really didn’t know a lot about was the southern United States. Chicago born, and sorta raised (he briefly moved to Connecticut for his mom’s work), Jaehyun was nothing more than excited, but also slightly worried about moving to the south for college. Some things he was sure about in the south - most people were probably racist, probably homophobic, and there probably were a lot of accents. What if he couldn’t understand them? 

Columbia, South Carolina seemed like a world away from Chicago, but Jaehyun couldn’t help that the University of South Carolina was literally the most perfect school for him. Besides the fact that he was granted a full-ride scholarship into their international business program, he had fallen in love with the campus, the warmth in his skin, that fateful Admitted Students Day, last April. 

Jaehyun was to leave for his first year of college in a matter of days and still had a lot of things to sort through, his old room, saying some final goodbyes to his closest friends, Johnny, who was following his dreams all the way to South Korea and Yuta, who had opted to stay in Chicago for school. 

Johnny liked to joke about how Jaehyun was headed down to hick-land and hoped that he didn’t come back with a southern accent, but it didn’t phase Jaehyun too much, he just told himself he’d figure things out when he got there, the way he did with most things.

——

The first thing Jaehyun noticed when he stepped out of the airport was how his skin was automatically wet. It was hot in Columbia, but also super humid, leaving Jaehyun already regretting the jeans he had worn on the plane. Sure, sometimes it was hot in Chicago, but he would usually be fine in jeans, but the heat here was just different, so different that Jaehyun wanted to strip to his underwear and lay under a fan. 

Because Jaehyun wanted to be pretty independent going off to college, he hadn’t brought his parents with him, he was already a tad familiar with how the campus was laid out and when he arrived at his dorm, the boxes he had sent out a few days prior were already piled up next to one of the beds. The other bed seemed to have been claimed, a pale purple fitted bed sheet already on it, but no person to be found.

It seemed as though the person had set up most of their side and had adorned it with trinkets that just breathed gay. From the mini pride flag in the pencil cup to the “Love Wins” sticker on the suitcase to the Mariah Carey poster on the wall, Jaehyun was pretty sure his roommate was gay. 

That wasn’t a problem though, Jaehyun was gay himself, just a little more repressed in his ways. Maybe it’s Maybelline, maybe it’s internalized homophobia, he couldn’t be sure. Either way, Jaehyun presented himself with a lot of masculinity, he’d always been one of the bro’s and would probably continue to be one of the bro’s after he rushed the frat that his father had been in when he was in college. 

Since it was still a couple of hours away from dinner time, Jaehyun figured he might as well start setting things up around his side of the room before venturing out to find food. He switched the AC window unit on and put it on its lowest setting until the room began to feel like the walk-in alcohol section at Harris Teeter. 

——

Unpacking was not going great - Jaehyun had stupidly bought Twin sized sheets and not Twin XL, so his fitted sheet wouldn’t slip onto the bed very easily and there was barely enough room for his mattress topper to fit under it. He had also realized that he left his electronic razor charger at home, so he was already going to have to call home and ask his mom to send it.

He had gotten a chance to talk to his mom while he set up, he could hear how much she missed him, and even though he wasn’t feeling homesick before, he was starting to feel awful about being hundreds of miles away from home. He missed his friends and the city and how he could wear jeans without sweating too much (which he had removed second after turning the window unit on). He missed just dicking around with Johnny and Yuta and shopping trips to the mall with his parents and grabbing gelato and going for a stroll in the park with his younger cousin, Jaemin.

The biggest part of all this longing for his family and friends was that Jaehyun hadn’t exactly seen anyone Asian on campus yet. He knew there was still a decent population of Asian people in the South, but he had yet to actually see anyone who looked like he did. Now maybe that was just due to the fact he’d been cooped up in his room for a little while, but he’d also done some snooping out the window of his dorm, primarily just seeing white frat guys with Vineyard Vines polos and white sorority girls, wrists covered with scrunchies. 

In the midst of all of Jaehyun’s reminiscing, his room’s door creaked open, his roommate slipping in, answering the wishes of Jaehyun's previous thoughts. His roommate was very obviously Asian (but to be honest, Jaehyun almost thought he wasn’t with the bleached head of hair he had) and he couldn’t have been happier. 

His roommate looked up from his phone, surprised to see Jaehyun, but the surprise soon blossomed into excitement and enthusiasm, as his roommate reached out with stretched arms, pulling Jaehyun into a hug.

Now it was Jaehyun’s turn to look surprised, as his roommate pulled back from the hug he couldn’t bring the look of his face.

“Hello, friend! I’m Jungwoo, your roommate,” he greeted with a slight Southern twang to his voice. “It’s such a pleasure to meet you! You are?”

“Oh,” Jaehyun was still taken aback by the hug. “Jaehyun. My name’s Jaehyun.”

“Nice to meet you, dear,” Jungwoo said with a smile so bright that it could light up Mariana’s Trench. “I’m sorry you look a little scared, did I do something wrong?”

“Oh, I just didn’t expect to get a hug right off the bat like that - I’m from Chicago, that’s not normally something we do.”

“That’s just some good ole southern hospitality, love,” Jungwoo winked. “You’ll get used to it.”

The roommates took a few more minutes to chitchat until Jaehyun’s stomach growled and Jungwoo suggested he take Jaehyun out for some “real good southern cookin.”

——

Jaehyun and Jungwoo ended up at a place called “Ma’s Home!” a restaurant within walking distance to campus. The dining halls didn’t open up until the following week, so now was a perfect time for Jaehyun to eat out and get some real authentic southern food. 

Jungwoo talked the restaurant up a lot, he said he had gone there on Admitted Students Day and that it was some of the best southern food he’s ever had. Ma was a short black woman, who seated them, took their orders, and was currently cooking their food. There seemed to be some other staff around, but they had gotten lucky enough to be served by the chef herself. When Jaehyun wasn’t sure what to order, he let Jungwoo take over, ordering for him. Ma gave Jaehyun a pinch on the cheek and remarked how cute his “little Yankee ass” was. Apparently it had become quite obvious to people that he was definitely not from around here and Jaehyun didn’t know how to stop giving off that vibe. 

Jungwoo and he talked about everything under the sun as they waited for their food. Jaehyun’s gaydar was definitely still intact, as Jungwoo got serious with him about his sexuality, going on about how he knew “fellas” like Jaehyun and that even though he was gay, Jaehyun better buck up and suck it up. 

Jaehyun laughed at Jungwoo because of his phrasing and assured Jungwoo he would cause no trouble because he was also gay, he was just a bit more masculine. Jungwoo sighed with relief, his features softening out to how they were when he had hugged him in their dorm room. From there, the pair really hit things off and Jaehyun discovered they had a lot more in common than he would’ve thought.

Jungwoo was also Korean, though he thought his Korean was pretty bad because he never had anyone to practice with. He also remarked how his grandma had teased him for speaking with a southern accent, something he wasn’t too insecure about in English, but something that brought his nerves out when he wanted to use his mother tongue.

Jaehyun absolutely loved that Jungwoo was Korean, he was glad his first potential friend here was of the same background as him, that he’d have someone to lean on and maybe shit talk a little in Korean if need be. 

When their food arrived, they dug in and Jaehyun thought he had died and gone to heaven. The fried chicken was otherworldly and the mac and cheese was so good his body felt like he was having an orgasm. 

After shoving their faces, the pair made their way back to their dorm after making a couple stops at shops along the way to get things they both needed for the dorm. 

Settling into bed a few hours later, Jaehyun felt quite at ease in his new home. He had a lot to say to his mom tomorrow and he was excited about it. 

—— TWO MONTHS LATER 

Jaehyun still didn’t know a lot of things. But he knew a lot more now than he did two months prior. Settling into his new life in the south had been a dream. He still wasn’t used to the humid heat, but he had adapted, figuring out a new wardrobe to wear for the remainder of the later summer. Fall had begun to roll in and the weather began to get a little cooler, leaves scattered across the brick walkways, as Jaehyun made his way to his KASA meeting. 

KASA, or the Korean American Student Association, had been Jaehyun’s family away from home the past couple of months. Jungwoo and Jaehyun had gone together to make some new friends and were pleasantly surprised when they were quickly absorbed into their ranks. Arriving at their meeting room, Jaehyun was greeted by Jihyo at the door, who was taking attendance as members shuffled in. 

He waved high to Jungwoo who was already in deep conversation with Chaeyoung, a girl he had been attached at the waist since the second week of classes. They both had biology together and one day after studying they both discovered they were Mariah Carey’s biggest fans and stayed up until the wee hours of the night binging RuPaul’s Drag Race in the common room. 

Chaeyoung became a familiar presence, as she was constantly visiting their room, but Jaehyun didn’t mind, Chaeyoung was a breath of fresh Northeastern air. Chaeyoung was from Boston and despite the differences between Boston and Chicago, Jaehyun was thrilled to have known someone else from the north, and the two clicked as quickly as Jungwoo and her had a few weeks prior.

Jaehyun took the first open seat, which happened to be next to the club’s vice president, Doyoung. Doyoung and Jaehyun hadn’t really talked much since Jaehyun joined the club. Doyoung was normally at the front of the room leading the meeting, so for him to be in the crowd this week was something different. 

Jungwoo had gotten fairly close to Doyoung because Doyoung was also gay. Apparently Doyoung had been complaining a lot about his lack of gay friends and now that Jungwoo had joined the club, Doyoung was all over him after every club meeting. 

Jaehyun, however, had always gotten the sense that Doyoung didn’t particularly like him. Some jokes here and there about how much of a bro Jaehyun was hadn’t really given him the chance to come out to Doyoung. Jaehyun definitely had a weird thing with his sexuality - he knew he had a privilege being not obviously gay, but he was sometimes frustrated that everyone just wrote him off as some one-note jock - he had feelings too, and most of them he felt out with a blunt and a Cigarettes After Sex album. 

He wasn’t just a jock. He was an indie jock and they should have put some more respect on his name. 

Jaehyun tried not to be awkward about taking a seat next to Doyoung, but he couldn’t help but feel Doyoung’s eyes narrow in on him. He shifted his body slightly hoping to meet Doyoung’s gaze, but he turned his body a little extra to keep talking to Joy, who he was mid-conversation with. 

Jaehyun just kind of sat there awkwardly and began to listen in on Yeri and Wendy’s conversation to his right, chiming in with a laugh or two when Wendy talked about how much she wanted to kill her chemistry lab TA. 

At long last, the meeting began, Irene, the club’s president leading the charge. Today’s challenge was to hang out with someone you don’t know very well outside of KASA and Jaehyun could feel Doyoung nervously glance over to him as if he was already dreading the idea of Jaehyun asking him to hang out sometime. Irene let everyone break out and talk again as Taeyong, the secretary, began passing small bags of chips out. 

Jaehyun knew there was some reason Doyoung didn’t like him and he still couldn’t be super sure, going only based on what Jungwoo said. He was determined to get Doyoung to like him even if that was by force.

Though he could feel Doyoung not wanting to talk with him he still spun around in his chair and made eye contact with him. He was too slow for Jaehyun today, very obviously trying to avoid Jaehyun’s eye contact but sighed and gave in when he knew he had been caught looking.

“So, Doyoung. Want to hang out sometime?”

Doyoung made a face that looked like someone had pissed in his iced tea, before faking a smile. “Sure Jaehyun! Here let me put my number in your phone. We could do... dinner at my place?”

Jaehyun agreed, kind of surprised. He figured Doyoung to invite him out for something painless like a movie, but a whole couple hours at his place having to actually talk? Doyoung had set himself up if he thought Jaehyun wasn’t going to make this the hardest dinner he’d ever had. 

—— THE FOLLOWING FRIDAY

When Jaehyun arrived at Doyoung’s apartment, he was actually kind of nervous. He didn’t know what he and Doyoung would manage to talk about over the next couple of hours. Doyoung was a computer science major and didn’t seem to like talking about the world the way Jaehyun did. Doyoung also seemed to not like Jaehyun so he hoped that he wouldn’t get laxatives in his food or anything like that.

He knocked on the door and it was soon opened by Doyoung, who greeted him more warmly than normal and offered him a glass of water upon entering. Doyoung’s apartment was unlike any he had ever seen... for a twenty-year-old man. 

The walls were adorned with tacky sayings painted in what looked like fake wooden planks. The one that stuck out to Jaehyun the most was one that read “God Made Dirt and Dirt Don’t Hurt.” Much of the decor in the house was made with some kind of softwood backdrop, with some kind of slogan or phrase written on it.

As Jaehyun took in the scenery, Doyoung returned from the kitchen with a glass of water. On top of that, he now wore a black apron that read “Southern and Sassy” in the most horrific cursive font he had ever seen. 

“We can go watch some TV if you want? The casserole is almost done.” 

Jaehyun nodded his head and followed Doyoung into his living room. The paintings on the wall with the sayings were kind of endearing, but in the way, an ugly dog was when it was begging for food. Cute, but you really wanted to help it because lord knows it needed it. 

Sitting on Doyoung’s sleek leather sofa, he noticed a fishbowl sat on the coffee table, full of corks and sand, obviously the centerpiece of the table. Around it was Southern Living magazines and looking at the covers, Jaehyun started to have an idea about where Doyoung got all his furnishing ideas. 

Doyoung took a seat on the love seat adjacent to the sofa and took a sip of his water. He began asking Jaehyun questions about himself, but the same vibe from the meeting last week still oozed off of Doyoung. Something resembling hatred, but Jaehyun couldn’t be sure why. 

Amidst their painful small talk, the noise of a chicken clucking came from the direction of what Jaehyun assumed was the kitchen.

“Oh! My timer. Jaehyun, come this way.” 

Jaehyun followed and Doyoung pointed him to his dining table and told him to make himself at home, while he took the casserole out of the oven.

“Also, Jaehyun, don’t mind me in the kitchen, I have to make a quick phone call as well.”

Jaehyun took a seat at the table and pulled his phone out to play Ballz and pass some time while he waited for Doyoung.

He could hear Doyoung’s voice, inquisitive as it spoke, but he couldn’t quite make out what was being said until he heard Doyoung shout. 

“What do you mean the cookies won’t be delivered until seven? This is absolutely unacceptable. Let me speak to the manager.”

Jaehyun gulped. He hadn’t ever heard Doyoung raise his voice like this before. 

“Oh, you are the manager?” Doyoung’s voice softened. “Well, sweetie, if you know what’s best you’ll make sure those cookies get here by six-thirty.” Doyoung said sweetly, not a hint of bitterness in his voice. He sounded like a completely different person than the one who was previously just yelling.

“Bless your soul, darling. See you at six-thirty.”

Jaehyun didn’t know a lot of things. But Jungwoo has taught him one thing. If you’re Southern and you use the phrase “bless your soul” it’s just a nicer way of saying fuck you or insulting someone for being dumb. 

Jaehyun was also a business major. He could do the math. And after adding everything up he had come to a conclusion. Doyoung had somehow obtained the personality of a southern white woman. The awful decor. The fishbowl with corks. The “Southern but Sassy” apron. A casserole. The “let me talk to the manager.” It was like Jaehyun had somehow ended up in the Asian version of Get Out. 

Luckily, Doyoung said the only tea he drank was sweet tea, so that ruled out the possibilities of him hypnotizing him and putting an older southern white person’s brain in his body. 

Amidst his shocking realization, Doyoung returned to the dining room, lips pursed, casserole dish held by two cloth pads. He set it down on the table and muttered something about going to get some sweet tea. He came back shortly with a pitcher and poured some for him and Jaehyun. 

Shockingly, Doyoung’s casserole was superb and Jaehyun couldn’t get enough of it. Maybe it didn’t have laxatives in it, but also maybe it had something addictive in it. 

Jaehyun hadn’t known what to say the first few minutes of their dinner, but Doyoung turned out to be an amazing conversationalist. They talked about their lives and their schoolwork and eventually Doyoung’s genuine interest in Chicago. 

Eventually, the cookies did come and Doyoung even tipped well, despite having given the woman on the phone such a hard time. He was demanding and mean, but it was nice to see he wasn’t completely heartless. 

After talking for a little longer on the couch and having a glass of wine, Jaehyun decided that it was about time he got back to his dorm. He had promised Jungwoo he would give watching Drag Race a chance and didn’t want to let him down, so he figured he’d take his leave. 

Doyoung walked him to the door, glaring at him a lot as he had at the KASA meeting. Jaehyun had thought he had finally won Doyoung over, but maybe it would be too good to be true, the other’s southern white woman personality too different from Jaehyun’s city-born-and-raised vibe. 

That was until Doyoung pulled him in for a kiss. Jaehyun’s eyes widened as Doyoung kissed him, he never would have imagined that maybe the signal Doyoung was sending him may have been lust as opposed to hate. 

Doyoung pulled away to see Jaehyun’s shocked face and Doyoung looked like he might cry.

“Oh my gosh, Jaehyun. I’m so sorry. I can’t believe I did that. I'm so sorry. You’re straight and all and I promised myself I wouldn’t do this.” A tear shed down his face.

Doyoung retreated to the kitchen, hands in his face, but Jaehyun chased after him, wrapping his arms around him as Doyoung leaned his back on the stove. 

“Hey, hey. Doyoung. Look at me.”

“No, I can’t.”

“Hey. Doyoung. I’m gay. It’s okay, I’m gay.”

Doyoung looked up and met Jaehyun’s eyes, a small smirk on his face. Doyoung slapped him.

Jaehyun had to admit. He couldn’t imagine that Doyoung slapping him would’ve hurt, but boy did it. 

“Don’t play games with me, Jaehyun. It’s not funny.”

Jaehyun straightened his face out quickly.

“No, Doyoung I’m not kidding. Okay? Trust me, I’m also gay. And you’re cute, Doyoung. Why would I be upset over a cute boy kissing me?”

Doyoung looked back at him and narrowed his eyes, still a little in disbelief. 

Jaehyun ran his thumb over Doyoung’s lips as he held his face and then leaned in for a kiss, a cautious one - Jaehyun was not trying to get slapped again.

Doyoung let him kiss him and he melted into Jaehyun’s touch. Jaehyun’s left hand rested on Doyoung’s hip, fingers looping into Doyoung’s Southern Tide pant loops. His right hand on Doyoung’s shoulder, near his neck, playing with the collar of Doyoung’s Vineyard Vines polo. They shared the kiss for another few moments, until Jaehyun leaned out of it, not wanting to take things too far. 

“You know you’re a real charmer, ain’t ya, Jaehyun.”

“So I’ve been told,” he smirked. 

“However am I going to get over you?”

Jaehyun paused. Then grinned.

“I’m not sure, Doyoung. But you know the motto: live, laugh, love.” Jaehyun said, mocking the sign behind Doyoung, which hung up above his stovetop.

Doyoung playfully slapped Jaehyun’s arm. 

“Bless your soul, Jaehyun.”

**Author's Note:**

> hope you enjoyed! i loved weaving in all those little southern sayings they're all so funny to me. as someone who's asian, grew up in the south, and sometimes has a slight southern twang this was all very funny to me. directly inspired by one of my mutuals who said doyoung is kinda like a white southern woman lmaooo
> 
> follow me on twitter @kunqianluvr69 or leave a comment below if you want to comment!!!


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